Laos - Part 1

Loughborough Lads Loose In Laos - Part 1: Vientiane and Vang Vieng 

Prologue

Well, for the upteempth time in a row this blog update is you guessed it, extortionately late. After returning home at Christmas which I'll talk about another time and being somewhat surprised that people actually read this thing i thought it was about time that i mashed some more keys in a incomprehensible manner, hit the publish button and called it a triumph of literature. So here goes...

(This one was particularly out of hand)

A fresh pint of lager was sitting in front of me as the KL skyline dominated the horizon in the now all too familiar skybar of the Traders Hotel  Kuala Lumpur. Perhaps this was a foolish choice as a few hours later, awoken by  my alarm at 4am I found myself squished into the tin bucket we call our car and trundling along towards KLIAirport.

Ket-Head Conveying the level of excitement

The country of choice this roll of the dice: Laos. Some may think that we simply spin the globe and wherever our finger happens to land we book but in reality our planning  process is much, much less sophisticated.  I have no real idea how Laos happened, but there were 16 Loughborough University Males including Twist, Toms mate from Singapore heading there for a week.

We knew right off the bat that it was going to be hysterical and possibly life threatening.

Breezing over the airports, flights (supplied by trusty Air-Asia), immigration and acquiring visas without any of the necessary documents or photographs we landed in Laos, unscathed and good to go. Now Laos is HOT..... i guess if you're from the UK, especially if you're reading this in winter. For us however its cool climate (relatively) and occasional breezes made it a welcome break from the extreme humidity of KL's 35 degree + heat and we handled it with ease.

Tuk Tuk Brah

We had arrived in the capital Vientiane, and were originally going to stay here for at least a night and then meet up with the rest of the guys in the infamous Vang Vieng, home of tubing. However, Vientiane proved to be a bit of a bore. Ultimately i think the blame lies with us, too eager to meet up with the guys and not really on a culture hunt resulted in it leaving us feeling somewhat underwhelmed.

Sad Panda.

Pha That Luang

After visiting Pha That Luang, the national symbol of Laos and quite an impressive structure along with stumbling into some kind of temple we decided to call it a day. We had been in Vientiane all but a couple of hours and we had sacked it off. Alas, it was the right decision but i'm sure the city had more to offer. Anyway, we went to the local bus station, quickly hired a private mini bus on the 7 hour journey through mountainous dirt roads to Vang Vieng and begun the journey.

This way by far the most hectic journey i've had in my life, accompanied by a Japanese geezer whose name i've forgotten the vehicle would hop between bars for the entire journey stocking up on 9-18 Beer Laos (detailed beer explanation later) at each point. Thinking back maybe his name was Leon, like the film about that guy who had a rather unsettling relationship with a young Natalie Portman, who knows.

Ave It Leon! (Stolen from Ket)

Back to the cab: at one point the driver picked up an old women (presumably his Mum) who hitched a ride for a couple of hours and this ludicrousness continued the entire journey. Through the outskirts of the city, the rural wildness of Laos and backwater farms we burnt rubber, the stereo blaring and beers being popped in a continuous ensemble. We literally drunk every cold Beer Lao dry in the 150km stretch from the capital to Vang Vieng, often dismissing warm beers and leaving the morose shop owners in our dust as we continued the pursuit for sweet, ice cool refreshment.

 It was fucking hilarious.

I can't deny it, this looks awesome. (Stolen from Twists GoPro)

At one point Parkin and Twist got on the roof and we continued on as normal for a good half hour and i completely forgot they were up there.  Generally I don't like to be seen as the typical British lager lout, but in this case i accept it with arms open.

The View from the hotel - Wow

We arrived in Vang Vieng. I had consumed easily 7+ pints of lager and was along with everyone else, trashed. Even our new Japanese friend had taken part, and we quickly got ourselves and him booked into a couple of cheap and trashy rooms at the top of the hill for 3 quid each.

Hostel - Not actually too shabby

As midday has merged into evening, evening merged into the early hours of the morning.

We became acquainted with a geez who went by the charmingly formal title of  Davo. Marooned in the town for 3 years, he was the very definition of a wreck head from Essex, washed up on every substance under the sun and with a thirst for more. He was a great laugh and rather amusingly knew Parkins sister (Imagine the jokes).

The night carried on.

.....my memory is mostly gone, we collided with some of the other Lufbra guys around 2am, some of whom had just bribed their way out of a stay in a Vientiane jail for crimes undescribed here and met a shit load of people who I've forgotten about from a couple of really sound Dutch Guys.

Regaining some kind of self awareness i looked around, saw Ket-Head and we made a B-Line for our hotel. We had no idea where we were and resorted to hitching a ride on the back of a scooter from some geez. It turns out we were about 30 feet form our front door but for all we knew we could have been miles.

It wasn't until the morning when i peeled myself off the blood stained mattress (note: £3 a night) that i could appreciate the beauty of the place around me. Spectacular scenery and a sense of rural serenity where i half dreaded to find a Malia in South East Asia starring back at me.

Blue Lagoon - Stolen From Louis

We hired a couple of Tuk Tuk's, and with the group 16 strong for the first time made for the Blue Lagoon - A beautiful natural pool about an hours drive through rural Laos, surrounded by Rice fields and running children. After a swim and some serious jumps from some of the guys we ventured into the cave system into the hill above, accessed by a near vertical climb. We decided to rent one torch between 16 because fuck the system.

Enter the Darkness -
 Only briefly illuminated by the camera Flash as a means to see what was ahead

Most of the group ventured only to the entrance but for some reason i followed a few others on a 30 minute quest deeper and deeper into the abyss, moving forward in what was  pitch black darkness. Feeling your path  with the tips of your toes and steeping and scrambling your way slowly first through tiny gaps then cavernous halls.

My flip flops lay abandoned at the cave entrance, I was a tribesman in my element and it was awesome. My only regret is that i didn't bring my DSLR with me as some of the photos could have been incredible.

Drive back in the evening sun

At the Blue Lagoon we met the two reasons why some of our companions had earlier been arrested - a couple of wreck head teenagers from Australia which looked like the archetype of Neighbours Ramsay Street rejects.

We all tried, unsuccessfully to shake off the hangover with a couple of cold ones while dipping our feet in the water and relaxed for the hours ahead. Later in the evening a few of the Lufbra contingents managed to crash land a Hot Air Ballon on the wrong side of the rider, resulting in wading back with water up to their waist to return to pseudo civilisation. But that's just the kind of holiday it was.

That night I bailed from Gary's Irish bar (great pies) for a quick "power nap" which soon turned into a 10 hour deep slumber, which whilst extremely lame and i definitely needed. Thus concluded night 2.

Lowdown on Vang Vieng

For those unaware, Vang Vieng used to be known up until a couple of months before we arrived there as one of the party capitals of Asia. Tubing - the act of sitting in a rubber ring which is actually the inner tube of a Tractor Wheel and floating down the Nam Song River as bars chucked you ropes was a huge appeal to pretty much everyone who didn't want to sit at home and play scrabble with their parents. Hell - it's why 16 of us booked these tickets and made us look twice at Laos in the first place.

Tubing - What is was (Google images)

Tubing however, had a darker side. There isn't a single professional hospital in the country (or so i am told), the nearest Ambulance coming from a 3 hour drive across from nearby Thailand to reach the capital of Vientiane  let alone the rural town of Vang Vieng. Mix cheap and basically free alcohol, an assortment of drugs, huge rope swings, diving platforms, shallow water and drunk young people and you have a result that kills. By the time we got there the party in the water was very much already over and talking to the surviving westerners the official Death Toll was around 25 a year i think, but word on the street is that was much higher. When you consider a year only consists of a small seasonal period from around November onwards of i think around 4 months you can see the numbers start to look a bit more disconcerting.

Rope Swings: Google images (some of this water is like a foot deep)

The rumour mill tells as follows:

After a senior Laos politicians son got killed whilst tubing they shut it down. Whether that's true or not all the bars along the river within 15 metres were pulled or burnt down and tubing effectively banned. The party was over, we were all pretty upset that we had just let this ultimate experience  slip through our fingers.

Regardless, the next day we went tubing.

Tubing after the party has left

Somewhere, someone is in trouble..

In preparation for the water based activities we all kitted up in matching Laos Tubing attire - shorts, beater and wet bag. (I do not wear beaters nor do I have the body for them), hired out our tubes and took a one way ride in a Tuk Tuk thing to the top of the river.

The Lads

Beached

Regardless whether the bars are shut down, the stereos are gone or the people have left, floating down the river with 15 mates, a  plentiful supply of booze and a beautiful mountainous backdrop is never going to go down in your mind as a day when you would have been better off staying at home. We had a hilarious time, and i came away from it slightly glad that the place was closed down. If it had been in full swing at least one of us would have got mangled on a bit of rock somewhere, it was bound to happen.

Rendezvous rock

Beer Laos Mid River Laos Y2K12 Cheers

Buying beer Laos from the rare local waiting by the side of the river was a nice perk, and it turned out to be a more peaceful than hectic day. Saying that by the time we got back to the town and dragged in by a group of kids we were all feeling the effects of our activities. I blame this largely on the 10,000 KIP bottle of Whisky that me and Niall invested in. (That's 60p, Sweet Jesus Lord have Mercy)

Group shot taken by a couple on a Kayak

Mountain Backdrop - It really was beautiful

Thus concludes day 3 after a relaxed night down Garys. 

Right, this blog has gone on way to long already, your attention is waning and thus i'm calling a break. Next up is Luang Prabang which we journeyed to the following day where we rode some elephants, saw some bears, jumped in some more beautiful waterfalls etc. 

BASE BASE BASE, I WANT A BUTTERY BISCUIT BASE.

Adios!

P.S.

Check out my Flickr for the polished photos at:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/glenncook/sets/72157632067033774/